Sunday, January 27, 2013

Trust in Me

After the whole cuffs fiasco, I was pleased when just a few days later he came begging for a little play.  I knew he understood my intent.  Trying hard to give me whatever little bit he was capable of.  Such a sweet token of trust.  

You see, part of our discussions the previous month had been over his holding back, not quite letting go of that last bit of control I needed.  Now given where we started, this was understandable.  Neither one of us had any idea exactly where I would lead us when we first started.  I had a lot to learn, things to discover, and societal habits that needed breaking.  Early on, it was clear he maintained a measure of control himself.  I didn’t mind, as it gave me a sense of comfort while I explored this new side of me.  AS time went on though, there were times when we played that he would completely let go.  During those times, I felt a sense of ownership, complete control.  As I came across this feeling more often, I wanted it more often.   I wanted it ALL the time.  But deep down I knew he had to finish letting go.

So for him to come to me while injured, hurting… trusting that I wouldn’t harm him, was a big deal for us both.   I could have chosen to let him heal more, but I knew it would do us more good to show the trust was well placed.  So of course we played… I’m really just that insatiable.  While I took great care to not aggravate the knee, or cause any pain in the area… I also enjoyed removing his mind from the pain for a while, as I pegged the hell out of his cute little ass.

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